[dating a very impatient horsegirl] me: her: babe will you giddy the fuck up please we are going to be so late

[forgets the name for strip club] titty circus

i woke up in a certified pre-owned bugatti

The first boob I ever saw was in Titanic. Never seen a boob since. Waiting for Titanic 2 I guess.

This is why the internet was created x.com/ramageftw/stat…

All 50 states.

I hate a, “my mom wouldn’t let me watch spongebob” mother fucker

I know how it feels! I can’t express how grateful I am to serve my fans. I’m overwhelmed by how many people took the time to make my day a little brighter.

you ask me to eat your ass and I pull these oht

did we have these before I can't be sure did they just add these

It’s no coincidence that the best waffles and sour patch kids are both blue

[juice WRLD after dating a horse girl] I still see your saddle in my room

‘Lincoln’ is a ridiculous fucking word

[dracula getting completely naked to take a shit] everyone else in the zoom meeting:

Wrote a song called “oui’d on a weekday” if u like it cool if not that’s cool too vm.tiktok.com/ZMR29oyLS/

whoever named meatballs did an outstanding job