“Could be about how oddly fetching you are when you’re nervous though. One never knows.”

“Well, they don’t call him Hawkeye for nothing, I guess.”

“Even toddlers can squish cement spiders. I’d not brag so much until you take out a real one.”

“Ooh, that’s gonna cost you. Implied threats are only going to make things worse for you and the next time you so much obliquely refer t’my son will absolutely be the last.”

“I’ve pheromones. The vast majorly of men are highly susceptible to them. If you threaten me, it’s because I allowed you to do so. Just a thing to bear in mind.”

“I’ve an awfully big mouth for a woman living with two men who really can’t afford being found. Need t’work on that.”

“If I rent the apartment above mine then I can Okay ‘knock three times’ and my ghost might meet in the hallway? Maybe?”

“Hey, so my kid’s completely in love with you and I might be too?”

“If he is I petition we call him Junk-Jess from now on.”

“Bit smarmy.”

“My son likes my ghost more than he likes me. It’s alright though, I suppose, as he likes Lucky better than anything. Even life I think.”

“Dancing with Gerry to ‘Mad Season’ in the kitchen and it almost makes living with my ex and my love interest worth the stress just to be able to have this moment.”

“My son doesn’t like ‘If I Fell in Love You’. In related news I’ve a barely used babby human for sale.”

“Snowy Saturday mornings are made for staying indoors and dancing in the kitchen.”

Still so cruel?

“Are there any female heroes currently pretending to be dead or being hunted by SHIELD? I seem to have become home for heroes suffering these plights but there’s too many men. I’m outnumbered three to one. Four to one if you count the dog. Send help.”

“Okay but no. My kid, the cutest potato EVER, sincerely likes that damn dog better than he likes me. He likes the dog better than the ghost too but they are, at least, in competition. Isn’t it Kate’s dog? If it isn’t can it be now anyway?”

//this is fabulous!//

“The strangest bit about motherhood isn’t telling Gerry not t’eat tampons. It’s learning that this thing that is one hundred percent all yours isn’t really yours at all. It’s knowing that you will never know the being closest to you the way the rest of the world knows that being”