me if Guillermo del Toro ever makes this movie

best exercise in the third trimester is standing shortly followed by sitting

i’m simply not made to put up with severe dumbassery. i need a work accommodation for this

someone in my baby group asked if they should name their human child “wilf”

best part of living in the UK is getting to wake up all my friends to the news that dick Cheney died

teams needs a block function

ahrens and flaherty touched god when they wrote ragtime

first thanksgiving pregnant

birth plan: getting an epidural so I have enough energy to do the defying gravity riff as I birth my child that’s it

last 10 mins of work for the next five months

This is like when you’re playing Civ and you get the notification that you’re now at war and you have no idea why

sitting next to my baby while I look at pics of my baby…like that’s my BABY

as a country, America is more divided than most of us have seen in our lifetimes. But in times of chaos and uncertainty, I’m grateful that we’re able to come together and unite against our common enemy: Colton Underwood #TheTraitorsUS

The Phantom Thread (2017)

ragebaiting my man by saying “yeah, that’s probably fine” every time he parks somewhere

Call my one month old the strait of hormuz the way she struggling to pass gas

Darkness cannot survive in the presence of light. Now put THAT between 2 buns & eat it