Mans out here taking and singing to himself on the bus today. I just wanna eat my pizza and sleep

What’s the point of offering same day delivery if you can’t ever do it/these 3rd party companies can’t read? Amazon

2hrs for my order? If you can’t handle being open on a holiday DoorDash you shouldn’t be open in the first place

Dallas, where calling 911 for police to deal with someone breaking in, and they show up and start destroying the building

We are out here braving the cold

vincent adultman 🌱🌱🌱🌱🌱🌱🌱🌱🌱🌱🌱 Ross I. Ok but the chicken biscuit will have you levitating at 3am with how good it is 🤣

Gotta love how they detour my bus for work but then don’t give any directions on how to get on said bus now.

You’re crashing on my couch and you’re gonna bitch at me when I’m trying to tell you the rules of my house OK

In case you weren’t aware, my dog is cute as fuck when he’s sleeping

Fell asleep at 3p on the couch and just woke up

Making some ramen this weekend

Gah damn something about the casting in Landman

I think I like girls that I actually hate to be around.

Small lips, undefined eyebrows, no exaggerated cheekbones, a smile without veneers or teeth that look like they've been washed with dish soap, no false eyelashes, natural hair color. Let's go back to basics.

In the Lyft listening to Disney songs… send help

Homie is chilling at the house and I’m tempted to scare the shit out of him by playing James brown off my Alexa while I’m at work.

Hey Marvel Rivals I wanna avoid more than3 people a game. Please make it be an unlimited amount

Need a woman to com sit on my face for 30 min and leave.

Bro the way she was rubbing his belly…

Currently shitting at the Arcade