You wear the armor of a mercenary. Now that's the life.

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"I don't know, took a wrong turn?"

"That or the snow drift was just right."

"Wouldn't that put the sleigh through the roof?"

"Good point, but it was a nice thatch."

"How many of them got on the catapult?"

"A device for throwing things and people curious about what can fit? Just a matter of time, there was a guard captain in Minas Turith that fell asleep in a trebuchet sling" laughs heartily.

Were there flying Balchoths that day?

"No, the surprising part was he survived."

"He wished he didn't as he landed in a pile of horse fertilizer."

"GOOD MORNING! HOPE EVERYONE HAD A GREAT NEW YEAR!"

"Or, impossibly, he hit his limit of mead."

"I did say; impossibly."

"Not if you eat right."

Do you remember when you joined Twitter? I do! #MyTwitterAnniversary

Do you remember when you joined Twitter? I do! #MyTwitterAnniversary

Deadlifts the reader.

Do you remember when you joined X? I do! #MyXAnniversary

Do you remember when you joined X? I do! #MyXAnniversary