I’ve got my TITTERY LOCKET! #spoonerisms

SO. WHY IS a gunman a gunman, yet a gunwoman is a female gunman? And what about the trans gunpeople?

WHO is this Al everyone keeps going on about? And how is he changing everyone’s lives? I ask again. WHO IS AL??

DONALD SAYS the charges are trumped up. Me says he farts through his mouth…

POEM And so tonight you will find this w⚓️ Hosting open mic at the Rope and Anchor Eight o’clock in Poole. Ya fool!❤️

STRANGULATION DURING SEX?? You must be choking…

Meet me in the bar. Don’t wear a bra…

STUPID DOT GOV wouldn’t let me have a blue badge even though I’m COLOUR BLIND. They said I could have a purple one…

My brand new single PTV and its music video are out NOW. You can find it and acquire it in all good places you can find music including but not limited toooooo Apple Music: music.apple.com/gb/album/ptv/1… Spotify: open.spotify.com/track/2y3BQ408… Music Video : youtu.be/N8jhAI0wcs4?si…

DO NOT TRUST ADAM WHITTINGTON OR PRC (Project Rescue Children)… A greedy and evil man running a fake charity. Pass this on!

‘Paranundrum’ (Of love and loss…) You cannot know love Until you have lost You cannot know loss Until you have loved

I SAW A vampire wearing glasses the other day. It was Spectacular.

WHY THE FUCK would you be carrying fuel canisters and fireworks?

Elon Musk Lone Skum Reckon he’ll reply??😂

I LIKE THAT in Greek mythology Eros is the God of love, passion and desire. And is Sore spelled backwards…😂🔥

WHAT HAPPENED WHEN the Guns ‘n Roses tour bus went round the corner too fast? The axle rose. 😂

FOR THOSE THAT don’t understand Elon Musk… He is self ex-planetary.

Watching the two of them together, he felt like a movie director; always waiting to take the next scene, but never getting to shout ‘Action’ because every moment that passed between them was perfect. And he never got to kick any violinists up the arse either…

WHY IS RFK Junior the secretary of health in the US when he sounds like the walking fucking dead??

IF ONLY I could monetise your stupidity…