ShannonPaterson (@shannonpaterson) 's Twitter Profile
ShannonPaterson

@shannonpaterson

Mildly charming klutz with a penchant for red wine.

ID: 15924336

linkhttp://www.contrabandpictures.ca calendar_today20-08-2008 22:35:06

459 Tweet

171 Followers

700 Following

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Let’s designate May 17 as The National DIPG day of awareness. No child should ever have to go through this. Please take a moment to sign the petition Canada! #DIPG #Canada petitions.ourcommons.ca/en/Petition/De…

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It blows me away that my kid has a 50% chance of getting her shoes on the right feet and yet manages to get it wrong 90% of the time. #parenting #momlife #kids

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I’ve discovered that owning a Bengal cat is basically like having a wild animal in your house who loves to snuggle. And will probably eat you if you croak. #KittensOfTwitter #kittens

I’ve discovered that owning a Bengal cat is basically like having a wild animal in your house who loves to snuggle. And will probably eat you if you croak. #KittensOfTwitter #kittens
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My daughter turned six today. I should preface this convo with the fact that I was a wee bit chubby as a child. D: mommy do I look like you when you were 6? M:yes honey you look a lot like mommy. D: does that mean I’m fat? 🤦‍♀️ she’s savage I tell ya. #Moms

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I just had to go grab another blanket because my cat is using the one I wanted and now I’m questioning my role in the universe. #cat

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I can’t see how any comedian will want to get up and host or present at the #Oscars after what Will Smith did and the #AcademyAwards complete lack of action in response to it.

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Many of us have been saying that comedy is dying thx to everyone constantly being offended. Now I’m starting to think it’s actively taking all of our great comics. If my comedy friends could wrap themselves in bubble wrap that would be great😔#gilbertgottfried #bobsaget #comedy

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Remember the good old days when people worked diligently to tend to their crops and raise livestock? Life was so much simpler then. Sometimes I really miss FarmVille.

ShannonPaterson (@shannonpaterson) 's Twitter Profile Photo

I am pretty sure that aliens are just humans from the future with really aggressive plastic surgery. It’s starting to seem like we are on that trajectory.

ShannonPaterson (@shannonpaterson) 's Twitter Profile Photo

My 6 year old came up and told me she loves singing her new favourite song “RER.” I wasn’t familiar so she sang “RER, say do you remember, RER dancing in September…”💕 #September Earth, Wind & Fire Brad Friesen *

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Apparently Dark Pictures Ent. Is adapting the memoir of Scott Weiland. Very exciting news and on a side note: Taron Egerton would be perfect for the role IMO. Very strong resemblance and he has the pipes! Here’s hoping 🤞

Apparently Dark Pictures Ent. Is adapting the memoir of Scott Weiland. Very exciting news and on a side note:  <a href="/TaronEgerton/">Taron Egerton</a> would be perfect for the role IMO. Very strong resemblance and he has the pipes! Here’s hoping 🤞
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I don’t know why I even need to say this but no one dining in a restaurant next to you wants to hear your FaceTime call. #facetime

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I just entered to #win a stay at #HiltonontheGreen: a pop-up hotel built right on the tournament course at the RBC Canadian Open. Click to see how you can too! hiltononthegreencontest.com

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When your friends draw all over you while you’re passed out drunk but you have to go out and play the Wimbledon final the next day. #wimbledon2023

When your friends draw all over you while you’re passed out drunk but you have to go out and play the Wimbledon final the next day.  #wimbledon2023