"The safe word is Alucard. That must be awkward for him since its Daddy Drac's safe word." God damnit, Dante!

*sees the Castlevania 'verse busting blood vessels and nuts over Lady Lenore, CEO of Walkies™(all IC, all in good fun) *gets out the pizza and popcorn and holds his own beer. Because chaos is funny.

"My parents are dead. What bedtime?"

"None of them apply when you're over eighteen, don't give a shit, or both. And by both, I mainly don't give a shit. Because you roasting your fellow vampires is far more entertaining than me and my brother beating the shit out of each other with far less mutilations to me."

"Waiting for the funerals. They wouldn't happen to be a couple of dingus deadweights with silver hair and katana fetishes, would they?"

"I'm completely in this picture and have no regrets." ...fucking dumbass teenage cambions...

"So the 'Vania verse is on full horny on main right now." He's stock with popcorn and pizza, and a case of Molson's. "You thirsty crazies may proceed."

//mid-late 30s at oldest. They only adjusted the timeline by four years, so now Vergil was a teen dad and not a 9 year old when Nero would have been born.

//been feeling the Brat muse again. May try and get him up and going again. ChaoticUmbra! Help! *brat cambion tears*

//I'm still alive! Fuck you, Covid!

Because he's out of pizza, and he likes to drive her insane. Not like she isn't already there. Also...hot pockets.

Oh look. He just stocked the freezer with a 12 pack box from wally-world.

Calling up Eddie's...need that pizza...like now. Double pepperoni , mushrooms, that touch of olive oil, sundried tomatos... And unlike another crazy boy in red who jumped around New York, Dante didn't need his delivered to a rooftop. Though that sounded crazy fun.

"Twenty ounce Caribbean lobster tail with a garlic butter bake. And scallops. With New York strip." ...so apparently the demonbrat has been watching Gordon Ramsay... "Its called Hell's Kitchen for a reason." ...GOD DAMNIT, DANTE!

Oh, almost forgot about that. "Reclaimer *yoink*!"

Oh look. He finally woke up. Time to grab some hot pockets, harass ⚜️Rᴏsᴀ '𝑹𝒂𝒊𝒛𝒆𝒍' Rᴇᴅɢʀᴀᴠᴇ ⚜️ while hunting some demons, and likely give his "Auntie" Bayonetta a few new gray hairs and an ulcer from Hell. Literally.

Napping since someone raised his food and booze stash. That's his story and he's sticking to it. Now where are some hot pockets? Preferably bbq beef.

... Phone out, a few taps at the touch screen... "Hey, Bobby? Yeah, its Tony. Yes, *that* Tony. Need a family size with pepperoni, bacon, olives, shitake, and a drizzle of olive oil. Oh, yeah, and put it on the Stillwater tab. "She's right here, ofcourseitschill." *beeeep*

He's crazy, not stupid. He's not answering that one directly.

He'll just heal them back. Buuuut it still hurts. "Fine, fine. Your boys told me about a special tab they have with Bobby's."