Seriously 😂 The Babylon Bee

In FY2024, U.S. Congress provided $516 billion to programs whose authorizations previously expired under federal law. Nearly $320 billion of that $516 billion expired more a decade ago. Source: cbo.gov/system/files/2…

Community Notes slays

My kids are settling in to the Vice President's official residence, and I just want to say: thank you to the American people. While we don't own this property, it is a beautiful home for our three little kids. We are grateful, and will take good care of it.

Heat trade Jimmy Butler for Andrew Wiggins, Dennis Schroder, Kyle Anderson and a protected first-round pick (via Shams Charania)

Jimmy Butler's time in Miami was special 🔥 -First NBA Finals (2020) appearance since Bron era -First No. 8 seed to reach an NBA Finals since 1999 -Led Miami as first Play-In team to make NBA Finals -Led Miami to three Conf. Finals in four seasons -Went to second NBA Finals

Working out without headphones is all willpower

The Heat have the 2nd most blown leads of 10 points or more this season (14). (via Pook Wade)

It’s easy to make excuses

ILIA TOPURIA JUST KNOCKED OUT CHARLES OLIVEIRA IN ROUND 1!!! AND NEWWWW!!! #UFC317 x.com/fightvidsz/sta…

Stephen Ireland, who targeted me with endless abuse on here because I oppose the chemical castration of children and the removal of protected spaces for women and girls, has just been sentenced to 30 years in jail for child rape.

Just one lifetime ago in the United States, our grandfathers could buy a home, buy a car, have 3 to 4 children, keep their wives at home, take annual vacations, and then retire… all on one middle-class salary. What happened?

Miami-Dade County needs to better engage their office employees. These guys look miserable.

Hip Hop at it's highest level of poetic excellence King Push is in his own league.

Parking meter attendants are career little bitches

Zero

The Ukranian girl that was killed on the subway

I want to DJ a set with only EDM bangers from like 2010-2013

Shaq explains why 2006 Miami Heat Championship is his favorite NBA title. Shaq: This is going to shock the basketball world. It's my favorite because we were not supposed to win. It was one I was pressured to win before the other guy got his fourth. The fact that were were a