Why is my baby so cute

Opening shifts at my job move so mf slow. I swear I have been here like 3 hours it's been 55 min

I bought a year thing of YouTube premium when I was drunk the other night and I have absolutely no regrets

91° this time of night is wild

I can't fall back asleep bc I woke up thinking about how it's "Jimmy Jr Pesto" not "Jimmy Pesto Jr"

I found out last night I am now 5'3" not 5'0" and I have a whole different mindset ever since.

I miss customizing Myspace profiles so bad

I can't eat an airhead unless I shake it. #iykyk

Blue gummy sharks have such a real hold on me

I was just sitting on my porch and my neighbor I've never met happened to be pulling out of their driveway the same time I went to swat a mosquito and they rolled down their window to have a conversation thinking I waved... I now have up coming BBQ plans with an elderly couple.

I feel like once I hit "skip intro" it should count for every episode of that show.

I have a sunburn and eczema in the same spot of my arm...fuck this.

Does anyone else remember those little manilla folder things with a rubber band that sounded like rattlesnakes?

Shout-out to all my plant babies trying their best to hold on in this storm

All gingerales are not created equally.

The new honey mustard Pringles are so good

56 days sober 🤙🏼

Just when I thought I couldn't love Max Greenfield anymore I realize that he plays boo boo on Bob's burgers.