Slowly finding out that the Dominican Republic is just Florida with somehow less rules

I miss the fucking Cowboys dawg 😔

Oklahoma’s version of “Damn that’s spicy 🥵🥵🔥” is putting too much pepper on something.

My wife just called to tell me that she thinks the missing Titanic submarine is a false flag operation used to distract us from some greater government conspiracy and I don’t think I’ll ever love her anymore than I do rn ❤️

Welp. It’s a fucking Monday alright.

Still waiting on the day that Whataburger® brings back the Chophouse Cheddar Burger to the All Time Favorite menu..😔

I fuckin hate Twitter

Not even Hard Knocks can make the New York Jets look good.

The days.

“Now THIS…this is REAL MUSIC!!” *puts on Half On a Sack by Three Six Mafia*

Man as much as I used to hate him, I miss Tony Romo😔

These refs are fuckin unreal

At this point, I just wish Dak would run the fuckin football himself. I don’t care if he gets injured. We got Rush.

Me

I will never understand the trucks with Salt Life stickers in Southwest Oklahoma 🥴

When Zak Bagans 🧛🏻‍♂️ said “We have worked years to build our credibility, our reputation.” in the intro of every Ghost Adventures episode…I felt that

All In #DallasCowboys

And we’re back Another weekend of shitty Dallas Cowboys football

You could be the largest Academy Sports + Outdoors store in the nation and there would still only be one person working a register.

My wife gave away all of our Thanksgiving leftovers to the rest of her family without me knowing, and I can’t even look her in the eye anymore…