How did the Commanders win that? My God, they were giving that game away

I don’t see how I will have the energy to get books that mention slavery taken out of the school curriculum if my food isn’t cooked on a gas stove.

Whoa

When it gets down to brass tacks, we’re all just bullshit compared to Sunglasses Ron

They’ll just find another one

Updated Texas Sex Ed Curriculum Instructs Children How To Stone Whores theonion.com/updated-texas-… via The Onion

Hey y’all, check out the obvious. Stop being trembling terrified idiots and check out the obvious.

Hey everybody, Johnny Highschool here is proudly advocating for illegal discriminatory hiring practices, and all his ding dong followers are admitting to doing so. Let’s get to the fines and the lawsuits!

Members of our well regulated militia shoot at each other while driving. One of them shoots and kills a woman in a nearby car, who was driving her daughter to pick up her prom dress. nbcdfw.com/news/local/dal…

Sinead O’Conner deserved a lot better than what we gave her.

Burning Man is a great event and I hope everyone there is OK However, it’s worth noting that all it takes to turn a libertarian, anarchist temporary autonomous zone into a government rescue project is lots of rain.

Kevin McCarthy is a prototype soulless corporate bagman, and if he doesn’t have the credentials to hold on to power then you have to wonder what it is that the people holding the reins of the Republican Party actually want.

He sounds like a guy yelling at random people on 34th Street with a karaoke speaker

It’s just going to be a life of billionaires siccing angry hicks on us, isn’t it

Stop pretending you care

Hey y’all, look at this goddamn happy older bubba. Look! You can have this! Sometimes it’s ok to go for the older ones at the shelter. They need you just as much.

If anybody in the DMV is not pulling for Max Fucking Scherzer tonight then move to Delaware. Seriously.

These Fox Sports announcers are jinxing the shit out of it against Toronto

I am so very tired of dumb armed hicks

I don't care, if you get up at 6:30am to drink before a 3:00pm baseball game, you've got problems.