"So what's your take" "This subway should be filled with sarin, a deadly nerve agent" "100% disagree"

The funny thing about the Earl of Sandwich is that you know peasants were 100% eating sandwiches way before him and had fanciful names for it. imagine being a peasant that year like oh my god the Earl of Idiotland is eating a Feast of the Two Wheat Doors and thinks he invented it

Hunter Biden really is the most ethical degenerate ever. No Epstein Pedo shit, Hunter simply just enjoys getting blazed out of his mind with consenting Latina sex workers of age. He’s a proper American Freak, a man of the people honestly.

don draper knows how to get himself into Situations and i respect him for that

people always wanna notice my dickprint in joggers but not the heart of gold dangling by a thread from my sleeve

A very ’90s Japanese Parliament cigarette ad featuring Charlie Sheen, with deep house music in the background. This was back when cigarette ads were still legal in Japan.

Pears are soft and refined. They don’t have manic supercharged flavors that pop the senses. Pears resist commercialization via soft drinks and candies through their complex regality.

Irish Zionism

My hand that i jerk off with looks way different than my Normal hand for some reason

Busting after I hit on 15 and then just holding my head underwater until I pass out and drown

At about 1:45 on April 1, 2026, Dillon T. Pickle welcomed his first baby(?) into the world. He would like to thank you all for your support throughout this unprecedented miracle of life.

Rest in peace my granny. I will not be disclosing the cause of her death for privacy but if you wish to donate to the funeral please direct all funds to the Bazooka Attack Victims Association.

holy fuck the worm just killed the early bird

I wish spiders were big enough to prey on us. The threat of being webbed up and sucked to completion would surely keep us humble

Mayor McCheese is weak on crime

That makes 13 scientists

officer i wasn't on my phone i was sucking my own dick

I'd shove my dick in a bear trap if it had winged eyeliner