Just blasted some guy with an energy beam. A big one, too. Classic. Kicked up an enormous cloud of dust that's still going. The guy just stood there! Now, if the dust clears and he's still standing, unflinching and stoic, I've got an issue. But I feel good about this one.

My infant daughter knows the names of hidden things, has seen the dark melt on her little fingers like icecream, has spoken to God and the souls of the dead and the voices in static. Why can't you be more like your sister?

Thinking about the time Vilhelm Agnussen tweeted “I have decided to renounce my humanity & become an island” and then there was an earthquake the next day.

👁️🌪️

Picked up another security shift at a dying mall. There's a CD store here, shuttered years ago. Every few nights, it starts playing nightmare music. The language of a starving god--craving worship, whispering lunacy. I'd complain but he's honestly starting to make a lot of sense.

Nice. Dave said he's in. Now all we need is a vessel for the malign intellect of The Unblessed One (the name we remember from our trances). Again, though, dead mall. So our options are a blow up doll from Spencer's Gifts, half an Orange Julius and a raccoon from the dumpster.

-Where have you been, honey?.. armor design

Your internal monologue is broken. Its use of language is non-standard; not machine-readable. You have fallen out of continuity with the immortalizing song, the machine that continues your sentence when you die

For the first 29,999 years, women had to hear "girls with daddy issues" jokes nonstop But when we hit that year 30,000. Oh boy, revenge will be sweet

I hope this one doesn't get buried it took so long to paint 😅🙏

we asked AI for an ACCURATE depiction of Trump ACTUALLY working at McDonald's MeidasTouch

Post your favorite "Desire Paths". These are paths that naturally form as a result of bad planning.

⚪️ 𝑳𝒆𝒕 𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒃𝒆 𝑳𝒖𝒄𝒆 🔆

ÆON △

Assembling a cyborg

In game Arachophobia option, except it’s suspiciously already enabled, and turning it off reveals every enemy is secretly a spider

Good morning.