Angry mom at street festival wearing a "give me butterflies" tee and white yoga pants

"Our fridge looks like a goddamn meat locker rn" -Josiah regarding today's BBQ

"I'm gonna take this tequila and shop vac my place all coked out" - overheard

I'd only I could have this beer to go

Everybody be careful, time is slowing down again

That cowgirl in the sand solo hit me really hard while stoned in traffic this weekend

Overheard: "Im gonna go home and watch mean girls, or, we should go to the strip club."

Is our role not to install new dictators? Michael O'Malley #demdebate

Stop referring to it as middle east Hillary Clinton there are so many people's and lines drawn

Bernie is mad because our country peaked by the early 80s and everyone else wants to talk war #demdebate Hillary Clinton

I would love to have Syrian refugees but we can't maintain an economy with willing to work immigrants #demdebate

"750 thousand people at 30 bucks a piece, THAT'S who I'm indebted to" - Sen. Bernie Sanders WORD. #DemDebate

Fact check 60% women Hillary donors, who is totally ignoring Bernie's wall street attack #DemDebate

Let's see you vote for woman with woman and as a leader of woman's rights Hillary Clinton

This generalist shot that everyone is dishing is so #CNN #demdebate Hillary Clinton and even Bernie Sanders

"We're playing like poops!" Said Dan

Dan wants to see Seattle Seahawks throw more far longs

Oh now I get why you slowly poison someone over a lifetime

"The wiretapped conversations became public during the trial of now-convicted Chinatown mobster Raymond "Shrimp Boy" Chow."

I need a txt auto response that says, "I'm getting tacos and then I'll be there"... And I'm not even going to sxsw