It's genuinely amazing that Trump was being forced to shut down a bunch of airports/flights because of funding And Democrats, right before Thanksgiving when they would have had insane amounts of leverage, went "cool, let's cave"

very happy my boss doesn’t have me on Steam, every WHF day is a battlefield day

you can’t even fly, your ass can’t pass thru a gotdamn metal detector with that BULLSHIT on yo head

negronis are christmas colored therefore i’m having 7

unfortunately my ex taught me that you do in fact have to worry about microcheating

thinking of technoblade tonight. miss you buddy.

guy in the industrial revolution: okay but have you seen how much water these steam engines are using

everyone should have two therapists, a man who tells you to grow up and get your shit together, and a woman who tells you to love yourself the way you are. Ideally they should be married to each other since at least 9 months before you were born

having a boss who says stuff like “excellent job” in her replies to me is so amazingly validating. i never thought id find something like that, im still over the moon about this job even when its stupidly hard.

not sure if i’ve ever read a worse take in my entire life. sincerely hoping this is rage bait.

coming into work today joyous beyond belief and i think my coworkers now officially think i am having a manic episode. the amount of weird looks ive gotten is insane. can a white boy not just be happy for the smallest reasons?

grey hairs on my head and i’m still snowboarding FAWK U MEAN

"i understand surface level people on the internet dont understand the chad/chud paradigm"

mac and i are yelling about how people dont know the ancient texts

I'm just tryin to keep my daughters off the pole and my sons out of jail

i was mocked for YEARS for telling people Chappell Roan was a bad person. the vindication i’ve felt over the past week has been second to none.

happy tax day to all those who celebrate

my broke buddy got twins on the way and he hit a $400 parlay the other night and ordered a parrot online