Idgaf how they pour it in Ireland

Coldmaxing my lunch with tuna salad sandwich and Thai peanut noodles

Strange to live in a time where when you ask someone how things are going after losing their job, most people seem relieved

I’m a dishwasher who occasionally serves beer

This whole Strait of Hormuz situation has really affected the Rumple Minz supply chain

My dog been perineum sunning way longer than these wellness coaches

Scott Pilgrim predicted what all these bands would look like

Had to back up off the weed BC Danny gets that shit that makes you forget to auto breathe

The ending to DTF St. Louis got me crying like a baby

Opening an in vetro fertilization clinic called Get a Load of this Chick

Justin: You ever think about the fact that you’ve never seen yourself blink? Me for the rest of the day:

This aged really well

If you attended: St Patrick’s day, Dingus day and Cinco de Mayo Click here for your prize google.com/aclk?sa=L&ai=D…

As divine retribution for not having children, the universe has burdened me with a cat who only eats the inside of temptations treats and leaves the crust all over the house