The way he was giving everybody with their cameras on him an angle. He said let me step back so y’all can get the whole fit.

my dad and step mom really just drove over an hour to drop off some medicine and soup for me. they’re never gonna go in a nursing home ♥️

42 for 42. #OxfordStrong

I for real cannot stop saying bing bong. I’m so embarrassed

I told this guy he looked like Jesus and he said I looked like some lady named Mary Magdalene. no idea who that is

first my grandma betty now my second dad???!! crying myself to sleep tonight

this sweet homeless man came up to me and said if I was his girlfriend he’d get me a benz, so excited for our future together ♥️

The scream I just let out!

I’m about to base my entire future on this twitter pole so don’t let me down!!! where should I move

I miss being kid and watching inflation from the sidelines 😢

daydreaming about being retired and owning a blackstone while I’m sitting at work ✨

something about the first couple days of warm weather in Michigan and listening to Quinn XCII 🪄

I really just sat here and watched a 3 minute tiktok of a guy squeezing a pineapple with his thighs. I’m so ashamed

whoever designed this emoji 🫑 deserves a pay rise bc they rlly put their heart and soul into this pepper

if I see one more tiktok of a mom doing her little girl’s hair 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 I’m gonna burst

Received this fascinating excerpt from the Journal of Scientific Shitposting

Tino standing on the stage after watching Rachel leave with Aven #bachelorette #thebachelorette

Me sneaking out of work 3 hrs early bc I don't want to be here anymore