Does. The splits. What The Fuck Is Going On And Does He Have To Cut A Bitch.

Lots of stretching. Gotta be flexible in order to Kick Ass and look cool while doing it.

"who's child is this-"

"h e l p."

"PAYBACK." x.com/Weirdmageddite…

"It's not like it'll woRK ON THIS PLANET." x.com/Weirdmageddite…

"TRY IT, SMART ONE." x.com/Weirdmageddite…

Grumbling. Next person to bring up the toaster will get Stabbed.

OR HIM NAKED. HE'S ACTUALLY KINDA SHY ABOUT THAT.

Ah, birthdays.... He's... Indifferent to celebration.

"If you weren't royalty and about a million times stronger than me, I would SO punch you right now." x.com/Weirdmageddite…

"Yeah, well, I'd basically have to turn myself in for assault on the highest degree if I did. So. No thanks. Screw you, though." x.com/Weirdmageddite…

His only thought is 'oh god aslier is going to be pissed.'

Not really, but that's one of them.

He's managed to pick himself up off the floor, hand tightly pressed over his wound. The guards are urging him to go to the infirmary, but..

He's refusing. Profusely.

ʙᴇɴᴠᴏʟɪᴏ sɪʟᴠᴀɴᴏs "Ben??? Benjamin???"

"I swear to Crewr if he's /actually/ just messing with me..."

Guess who got drunk with his boyfriend to Cope™ Him.

It's been a rough month.