“Erm.... Saving the world! Yes! And also I was in my underwear while doing so! And um... erm...... unicorns with laser beams protruding from their nostrils?” He would attempt to think of the craziest thing he could conjure up to keep what little cover he has.

He would nervously chuckled, tugging at the flak jacket he wore a little as he did so. “What an oddly specific test! Though I assure you, I will continuously pass such a test with flying colors!”

“N-Not at all!” Well shit, he is gonna have to think of more weird shit. Perhaps his pets will be of assistance for creativity.

He just sorta stands there, staring down at her for a second before the ground underneath him chirps, lifts up slightly, and moves him to the side. Spiderants™️! Wonderful for the lazy, bad for the crazy!

“Ah? You mean my friend?” The spiderant popped out of the ground and chirped at Tina. “He is safe, do not fret! He is actually a cuddle bug when he warms up to you!”

The spiderant has Flak step down so it could crawl out of the ground, stepping close to the other before looking at Flak. “Do not worry, friend! She is very kind!” The spiderant then looked back at Tina and pushed his head into her hand.

Flak shall exclaim to the world that Skags like this need proteccing and not attaccing

“Flak is the name.” He would do a little bow as the Spiderant chirped happily at Tina. “And for my friends’ names, they don’t truly have one. We simply know who speaks to whom. That is how tight our bonds are amongst one another!”

“Well, the thought to do so never crossed my mind. However, I’m sure he would be delighted to see what you can come up with!” The spiderant chirped again at her, the abdomen wagging like a tail for a second before he hopped a little.

Flak would think to himself, look at the spiderant and the spiderant would turn to him. Chirping a few times at Flak, the vault hunter would chuckle and nod. “Seems like he likes that name!” The spiderant would hop and chirp at Tina happily.

“Isn’t he? So are my other friends. Hmhm!” The spiderant would push against Tina, allowing the girl to hug him as his abdomen wagged again. Such a happy bug boy.

(And Flak will immediately panic. Save him)

( -Insert panicking robot sounds and probably Skag borking here-)

(AND HE WILL BE SPOOKED)

“Of course he is! You wouldn’t think that this adorable creature of nature is a great fighter! I can’t count the amount of Calypso bandits he has fried!”

The spiderant would chirp happily at her, nuzzling up against Tina as it did so. “Hmhm! It’s quite the spectacle!”

“Explosive shockwaves, fire, corrosion, electricity, the whole nine yards Sir Cuterson has been through. And Sir Cuterson’s been able to withstand it and then some! He can even gain some of the powers of whatever hits him!” He loves flaunting how cool his pets are...

“Well, I wouldn’t mind joining! I certainly would love to consume some warm beverages, and I think Sir Cuterson wouldn’t mind at all either!” The spiderant hopped around and chirped happily at Tina as Flak spoke.