aw hell nah not my son

Get to the gig (says i, the blasphemer, for i am attending a different event tonight)

This feels like a david lynch production

I get to see my nephews and niece this week which is very cool i love being an uncle

Police killed 14-year-old Brett Rosenau during a SWAT raid in Albuquerque last Wednesday night when they threw flash bangs into a house he was visiting setting it on fire. After saying they didn't know what caused his death, they have now confirmed he died of smoke inhalation.

Might get hammered at this ska gig only time will tell

Cum-41

Being over 21 at a gig fucking rocks hell yeah im gonna spend $30 on white claws

Do you know how many white claws you could get at the store for $30 i bet yoy could get way more than i drank last night

Farting directly into a fan to get that robotic tone

As a man, my power comes from my boobies

Some people just wanna watch the world burn

The coolest part about getting married is that the marriage license cost $69

Sex is cool but has anyone ever told you “i like your beard”

Alright i guess all my followers here are hairless virgin

A List of Things People Blamed on Jazz 🧵

I’m online, even tho nobody cares

I just remembered that i bought a ps2 and i can play the Simpsons game when i get off work 😎