This isn't breaking news. x.com/cnnbrk/status/…

Is there a filter to mute anything Trump related?

Y iz this news? x.com/AP/status/8719…

Me on dating apps: *swipe right swipe right swipe right* App: "haha have no matches"

Coworkers: "I wish I wasn't so fat" Also coworkers: *brings in and eats doughnuts everyday*

If a white girl goes to happy hour and doesn't boomerang it on Instagram, did she really go to happy hour?

Don't mind me, just eating tacos for the tenth day in a row.

When you're a man, but also a woman. When you're old, but also young. When you're attractive, but ugly AF. x.com/ABC7Chicago/st…

"That's what I do, I drink and I know things."

When you have a week off but nothing to do 😑😑😑 #HermitLife

2017 'bout to get lit. x.com/nypost/status/…

Me IRL

CNN kicking off the morning with a sick burn

*logs into Twitter for first time in weeks* Everyone in my timeline: "WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!!!!!" Me: "Well okay then"

He is like a three eyed raven x.com/realdonaldtrum…

I hate you 😭😭😭😭#GameOfThrones

Whoa whoa whoa. The new American Horror Story has a part with a woman screaming at the TV because Trump got elected? #DisGonBeGood

That weird moment you realize you're a grown adult that doesn't have anyone to invite to a wedding.

Ben with no front paws needs your help xx youcaring.com/ben-941670

Nothing like flying solo at a wedding to remind you how alone in this world you really are