I CAN WATCH A ZIPPER WORK IN FRONT OF MY EYES AND YET IT ALL JUST SEEMS TOO EASY TO BE TRUE

I keep making purchases and y’all really keep taking the money out.

Good morning let’s get those Texas Roadhouse bread rolls

Idk who needs to hear this today but feed your Nintendog

“When was the last time you heard any good music?” Me:

Okay so apparently it’s totally fine to have breakfast for dinner but as soon as I pop my lasagna in the microwave at 7:18 in the morning suddenly I’m the bad guy??????

Dude has a prosthetic tattoo gun, this is the most Cyberpunk thing I've ever seen.

one taught me love one taught me patience one taught me pain

Sound on for a surprise

Me: *sees someone vaping* My brain: don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it Me: Woooooooowww

This is how McDonald’s creates their sprite

*Snapchats somebody literally once* Me: Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do it Snapchat: 😊

so no head?

*meets someone from Rhode Island* My brain: Don’t say it Don’t say it Don’t say it Don’t say it Don’t say it Don’t say it Don’t say it Me: “do you know _______?”

best 2000’s songs ranked: 15. you 14. can’t 13. rank 12. them 11. because 10. they 9. are 8. all 7. very 6. special 5. in 4. their 3. own 2. way 1. Burnin’ Up - Jonas Brothers

MY CINNAMON APPLES