At 6 AM this morning, I heard Blayze do his “I need to poop” whine. While I’m walking to the door to let him out, Lucas was shocked as hell & was like “wait mommy, do you speak dog?!” 😭😭😂😂😂😂😂

“Were you not just shit faced a couple nights ago, how did you do the great aloha run with Lucas?” LMAAAAO it’s called “balance”😭😂

Stayed up last night till 1 AM creating a PowerPoint presentation for this morning’s middle school career fair. Basically 10 slides explaining why I chose to do hair instead of wiping ass & professionally explaining that I paint hair and run my mouth all day 😂

It’s like every one is pregnant!!! Whatever water y’all drinkin.. pls keep it away from me hahaha

Bro how the hell is a SMALL size at Jamba Juice now $8 something.

we dgaf now sing Since U Been Gone

I cannot wait to take Lucas to Disneyland this May!! After all the shit he has been through in the last 3 years since the separation with his dad, he deserves a bomb ass 7th birthday 😭❤️

I don’t work out to lose weight. I work out so I can comfortably carry my Costco groceries upstairs with no struggle 😂

Lucas is 7 today!!!! 😭❤️❤️❤️❤️

I am so grateful Lucas is soooo loved! So many of his aunties & uncles sent him Disney birthday money 🥹❤️

I just paid $6 for a musubi at the airport. Fucking wild 😂

Me FaceTiming Heather while doing my make up: “It’s weird BC your face is smooth like child but you also look like a mom. You look old but young at the same time.” ????? What? 😂 #dumbshitheathersays

One time after work, I was bummed I couldn’t go hiking because I forgot my socks. One of my older co-workers now keeps an extra pair of socks in her locker just for me 🥺 That is love.

I love Uber drivers that don’t talk to me. This is amazing. & the soft piano in the background is a plus

So everyone knows Ethan looks like Mr.Clean.. Ethan: “Lukey can I cut your hair?” Lucas: “No. Cause I don’t like bald” 😭😭😭😂😂😂

No one prepares you for the death of your fur baby. When I say my heart hurts every single day, I mean it. The littlest things remind me of Blayze & it hurts 🥺

Had my first dream about Blayze since he passed away. He had the zoomies & was so happy to see me. He was so happy & healthy looking! I literally bawled I’m my sleep, I miss him so much 🥺❤️

It’s like everyone’s top artist on their Spotify wrapped is Taylor swift 😂

My client took Lucas to the store down our salon and she asked, “do you know what mommy would like to drink?” He fucking says “she likes tequila” 😭😂😂😂😂 faka

This one girl said, “Dating a man that has never owned a passport in his life is a low for me” & that got me fucke up 😂😂