kids of teachers who teach at your school are the first nepo babies you meet in life

This resonates

Life is a beautiful struggle. That backpack rapper was right. But Jesus we struggling five days in?

So Wendy what are your hobbies? Uhhhhhhh I like to watch documentaries and be left alone. I didn’t know I needed hobbies

Oh hey super anxiety —I did not miss you at all. Glad you tagged in so normal anxiety can take a five and I can feel sweaty for no reason and every reason all at once.

Ms Rush can you griddy? Yeah Do it! Nah

Students in p6: we heard you turned into west side Rush this morning. Me: if you heard I said it I probably said it

Me: On a scale of one to ten how awkward was it? My friend: I’m not going to answer that Me: oh so a two then?

Nothing like watching yourself fuck up in slow motion to slap you back to reality

Let’s be friends No thank you— give me my number back.

Ms I really respect you. Me: coughs. Ummmm that might be—are you sure?

Them: Oh we’re like the same age that’s the year I graduated high school. Me: Yeah …that’s the year I got my masters degree. Keep it movin baby boy

“Im proud of you” is such a powerful sentence

Happy ides of March! Hope you don’t get stabbed in the back today!

T pain covering Black Sabbath was a treat I was not expecting

Ohhhh miss! Why are you smiling at your phone like that? Me: it’s nothin Yeah right miss. Me: shows the dominos order approaching on my phone

“Why you gotta fight with me at cheesecake you know I like to go there ” still sends me into full laughter every single time I hear it

It’s like his death birthday

Someone said, out loud, that I will make a great wife for someone someday. How I’m not catching a case I don’t know but it’s the lords work today

Yes, you are solidly lodged in my heart-- such that it is: the cold heart of a fish.