every day opening instagram to see yet another 49er signed to another team

every time i go to my local trader joe’s they ask me what i’ve got going on for the rest of the day and i have never once had something interesting to say. going to trader joe’s is what i had going on today, friend, idk what to tell ya.

visual aid for 😌🔪😌😌

the way widgetsmith’s countdown widget abbreviates months to “mths” instead of “mos” drives me absolutely insane but luckily i have adhd and forget it’s even there 98% of the time

there is something so beautifully restorative about a delicious sandwich. my god. whoever invented sandwiches let it be known i’d marry you on the spot

My job is just… Meeting

my fiancé: dude Sourdeath Sam really needs a podcast or something me: you are not gonna believe this

*gets engaged* *5 friends get engaged* *furiously googles how to dye various fabrics so i can rewear the white dresses i bought during my engagement*

dallas defense “swarming” cmc is apparently just a personal foul 6 seconds in and then going offsides

forecast says it’s McCloud-y with a chance of Ray-Ray 🍝 RayRay McCloud III #FTTB

“There was nothing that the 49ers did, besides us beating ourselves.” — Cowboys Micah Parsons on a game where 49ers pulled starters at the beginning of the 4th quarter

somebody must be sour bc he is delululemon 😙

oh yeah, this is what it feels like to be a San Francisco 49ers fan 🫨

my favorite part of the cut divorce article is this super long comment where this person says they didn’t read the whole article then goes on to diagnose the author with the actual disorder she talks about getting diagnosed with… in the article.

got our wedding video back and thought yall should know that we both talked about the San Francisco 49ers in our vows 😅❤️💛 #ninersfaithful