I know the paper towels hate to see me coming in the kitchen.

Running to my bed after successfully surviving a day at work

When it’s time to leave after y’all spent the whole day together

Agreed, a vote for Kamala Harris is a vote for 4 more years of censorship and abuse of power.

“See you at 8.” Me at 7:59.

every time i talk it sounds like it's my first time trying to speak

Leo: "I grew up financially well off" "I went to private school" "I'M A RICH FUCKING ART DEALER" #LoveIsBlind7 #LoveIsBlind .

I can only say “Noooo Lucy” so many times in fifteen minutes #TellMeLies

#TellMeLies stephen:

Holding Out for a Hero will forever be attached to Shrek 2

︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎

you'll ask a man if he's tired and he'll say no, then start snoring 20 seconds later lmao

How come 8 hours at home take 20 mins but 8 hours at work take 6 days

& every time i blink the fucking laundry basket full again 😩

i want whatever the people who run at 6am have