Wild swimming = swimming Slaw = coleslaw Side-hustle = part-time job Mac 'n' cheese = macaroni cheese Long read = feature Bone broth = stock Running = jogging Staycation = staying at home, not holidaying in the UK, which is a holiday

I'm sorry but every time I see the words "Lord Pickles" I think they're talking about a very fancy cat.

Tonight’s TV tips: at 8pm, #MercuryPrize on BBC4, #CelebrityMasterChef on BBC1, Don't Hate Your House on U&W or Dr Michael Mosley on C5. At 9pm, Rose Ayling-Ellis on BBC1’s #WDTYA, #TheTower on ITV1 or Emma Willis: Delivering Babies on U&W. At 10pm, #CouplesTherapy on BBC2 #telly

Streaming-wise: new drama #ThePerfectCouple and Apollo 13: Survival both drop on Netflix. #DrDeath returns to Paramount+ #telly

Film-wise: at 6.50, Devil Wears Prada on Film4. At 9pm, Looper on Sky Sci-Fi, French Exit on Film4 or western Ulzana’s Raid on Legend. At 9.15, Porridge film on BBC4. At 10.45, Get Carter on BBC4. At 11.15, the mighty Trading Places on Film4. At 1.30, Blood Simple on Film4 #telly

Watercooler casting! Embrace the drama! Rein in the pros! As #DancingWithTheStars signs up con artist Anna Delvey, complete with ankle tag, I wrote about what #Strictly could learn from its American edition #DWTS #SCD #StrictlyComeDancing telegraph.co.uk/tv/0/dancing-w…

hahahahaha- who says crime doesnt pay

What a day for bumping into unpalatable people. I just saw Jamie Redknapp. Happily I needed a No2 which was much more pleasant than stopping to talk.

This makes it look like Gregg is being haunted by his Belgian cousin

Watercooler casting! Embrace the drama! Rein in the pros! As #DancingWithTheStars signs up con artist Anna Delvey, complete with ankle tag, I wrote about what #StrictlyComeDancing could learn from its American edition #Strictly #DWTS #SCD telegraph.co.uk/tv/0/dancing-w…

subscriptions >>> shop.viz.co.uk/viz338tw

When it comes to Mercury Prize winners, English Teacher aren't a patch on Elbow, which is quite ironic I suppose.

This kind of gag is why I find it hard to quite Twitter altogether:

Tonight’s TV tips: at 7.35, Scotland’s Remotest Pub on BBC1. At 8pm, #GardenersWorld on BBC2 or Mancini, Bacharach & Friends at #Proms on BBC4. At 9pm, #FunnyWoman on Sky Max or Michael Palin’s Nigeria on C5. At 10pm, Guy Garvey's Vaults on Sky Arts or Golden Cobra on BBC3 #telly

Streaming-wise: Finnish crime drama #Bordertown drops on Channel 4 streaming #telly

Film-wise: at 7.10pm, The 39 Steps on Talking Pictures TV. At 9pm, Under Siege on Film4 or Kiss Of The Dragon on Great Action. At 10.40pm, Wedding Crashers on BBC1. At 10.45pm, Millions Like Us on Talking Pictures TV. At 11.05pm, Lady Macbeth on BBC2 or Sleepy Hollow on Film4 #telly

Train hijacking! 24 meets Bodyguard meets Speed! See it, say it, sorted! I spoke to the excellent cast and creator of new real-time BBC1 thriller #Nightsleeper theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/a…