He is risen.

😇 🔪

#Breaking: Trump has been indicted on charges related to an alleged hush money scheme, becoming first former U.S. president in history to be prosecuted. latimes.com/politics/story…

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but please stop talking so much.

He is risen! (Now it’s time to learn his name and see if he makes breakfast)

Happy Mother’s Day to all the sluts!

“55 obstructions of justice, 55 conspiracies, 55 schemes to conceal, 55 false statements, 55 willful retentions of national defense information, 55 trea…”

So, let me get this straight: yesterday the Supreme Court ruled colleges CAN’T discriminate on the basis of race but today they ruled that a web designer CAN discriminate against the LGBTQ+ community? Sorry, but this Court is so freaking messed up.

I find it darkly amusing when obituaries say “ _______ sadly passed away.” I want to read one that says “ _____ hilariously passed away.”

I’m going to post this in hopes that it reaches even just one person who needs to hear this: Take your phone off speaker when you’re in public. No one cares. It’s obnoxious. All my love.

San Andreas Fault, you have the opportunity to do the funniest thing right now.

Los Angeles rn #Hurriquake

#andjustlikethat #KimCattrall Kim Cattrall

“It was a lovely service, I’m so sorry for your loss.”

I was so inspired by a woman in my strength class who shocked everyone by revealing she’s 78, though she looks much younger. We all complimented her. So that inspired me to tell everyone I’m also 78 so that people will always tell me I look younger.

Rest well, Matthew Perry. You fought for your sobriety. You fought for your happiness. You shined a light on addiction and conveyed it with humor and humility. You made high school happier. You made college lighter. And now you have found peace as your star continues to shine.

One week from tonight! Convoy Pops Up with Betsy Sodaro, Tony Rodriguez, Victoria Longwell, Mark Rennie, Chase McCown, Michael Lucid, Conner Shin & more! Sunday 4/21, 9pm. Tix: eventbrite.com/e/convoy-pops-…