Who decided that drinking water was something fun to do?

I fold so fast! 😂

Some cute dude need to fall in love with me so I can get the hell off tinder 🤣

Not sure why I’m not at the Kentucky Derby trying to find myself a rich man

I want a wittle baby 🥹🥹

I’m pretty sure I was supposed to be Justin Bieber’s baby momma… something’s not adding up

Sometimes when I look at picture of myself it doesn’t feel real. Like there is no way that’s me in those picture because I do not recognize that girl

Imagine taking a pregnancy test that come out positive and you get to tell Justin Bieber that he is the dad!!! 🤯

The crazy thing is if I was 55lbs lighter I would be that bitch! Like I know I’m pretty but just over weight forsure! 😂😂😂😂

I wish I had a friend who liked to fix cars because my car hates me

Patiently waiting for a man to say “For God's sake, Maura Asure. Are you going to marry me or not?”

Just need money for a bbl, some botox, a little nose job. Honestly nothing crazy

Deleting me on any form of social media is crazy because all I do is sit at home and mind my business 😂🤷‍♀️

I just want a man in my life that will buy me a moped

I was on a tractor wagon ride today In Nashville and I say Lil Pump standing outside a paint shop. I keep telling the other girls on the trip it was him and no one believes me

$1000 extra dollars would be a big game changer for me right now 🥲

SOMEONE GIVE ME $5000

Tbh I still haven’t fully processed that Liam Payne isn’t alive anymore.

I’m delusional and that’s okay.

Nooooooooooo!