No shot Ezra just threw up on me 15 minutes before my class lmao

when a girl doesn’t find me funny that’s kind of a problem because that’s what i was banking on

Maybe your garden isn’t growing because every time a flower grows you cut it to prove to someone that you are a gardener

Asked my barber to clean up the mustache and now I am full of deep regret

people who watched 5 movies lat year loud as fuck on here

Single guy winning an Oscar: I’d also like to thank this girl I’ve been talking to recently

DUNE PART THREE

i am not the man i was one trailer ago

🗣️🗣️🗣️

The amount of Dune spoilers I’ve seen in just the last two hours.. it’s time to pick up the books 🫩

Spider-Man: High at Home

ever since i was a little kid i knew that i wanted to be late for work

this is when i realized the nice guys was a different breed 😭😭

no millennial trope has broken more brains than "you don't owe anybody anything". an ignoble, selfish narcissism dressed up in therapy-speak about boundaries and self-care in order to give yourself a pass from treating other people with a basic level of care and respect

They want LeBron

yeah that jjk episode was one of those ones

Saving myself for my second marriage 💯

Tiger was tryna open up a Domain Expansion on dem cops fulla dem jiggas

Dropped the ball on those Dune IMAX tickets 💯