Trump begins today's rant by wishing Melania a happy birthday while simultaneously whining about his case

Kristi Noem kills a dog Twitter:

Eric Trump has surfaced to sit in the Manhattan Courtroom where his father is on trial this morning. Still none of the familial support you'd expect from his wife, three other grown children & the son-in-law he took to the White House with him.

As hard as it is to keep him awake when his literal ASS is on the line,imagine who was running the actual country for the 4 years he worked 2 hours days

Trump just did his daily courtroom whine session: "The economy is doing terribly...gasoline is way up...I don't think there's any way they can cut 'em [interest rates]...they'll have to remain very high...getting ready to spend another day in the courthouse, which is bogus trial"

Kristi Noem claims that Cricket was a serial killer, preying on prostitutes in lower North Dakota from 2010-2013.

It blows my mind that in the 50s & 60s, strange men selling vacuums & encyclopedias would knock on doors & be welcomed into a woman's home while their husbands were at work & their children were at school. Wtf kind of creepy madness was THAT?? 😳

𝕃𝕒𝕟e I don't even acknowledge my door. Knock, ring... I'm not moving an inch. Unless you start screaming who you are and what you need me for... I am made of stone.

Rafael Cruz: ‘The Good, the bad and the fugly.”

How many GRIFTS could a VonShitzInPantz GRIFT, if a VonShitzInPantz was given total presidential immunity? 🦫 💰

Today: - Trump summoned Jeanine Pirro to chat with him as he left the courtroom. - Trump later tells everyone to watch her on Hannity tonight. - Pirro proceeds to attack Stormy Daniels, Michael Cohen, and the jury during the show. meidasnews.com/news/trump-jea…

🚨New #Beans with Mueller, She Wrote & Dana Goldberg #MSWMedia Listen: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ban…

That Evangelicals rejected Jimmy Carter and worship Donald Trump shows you they really don’t give a shit about Jesus or his teachings.

Jane of the North Done. 🤣

John Eastman thought he was so smart that he could Trump pull one over on the citizens of this country. In this photo, John John has that “Aww, F*CK!” Look on his face. Just wait until he sees where he’ll be spending his “Golden” years.

#BleachBlondeBadBuiltButchBody 🤡 Marge's self affirmations must be wild.

Now that the jury has begun deliberations, poor Donald is falling apart. He knows where this is heading.

Rudy Giuliani’s mugshot.

Moms? The Gays? Allies to women in general.....I need a damn hug. Life is crazy and times are strange.