I love this 😆

Accurate.

Alright I’m really into Genesis and Phil Collins don’t hate me.

I don’t want to stay at your parties. I don’t want to talk to your friends. I don’t want to vote for your president. (There’s a place I’d like to be)

Hey Karen - this happened before 10. Read the rules. Also, take one guess as to what the slamming sounds were about. I suggest you try it sometime.

Having an almost mindless contempt of money is encouraged by and is a trick of the wealthy, who seek to protect their own wealth by keeping others down.

Worst tattoo ever. Guys don’t even consider.

#NewProfilePic Summer is over and I am pregnant. So time for a more appropriate pic.

The Carolina Panthers suck and I won’t watch them anymore.

Hitler gets his own magazine?

Hitler says I am a hooker. Don’t listen to Hitler.

Mood…

Just finished the Menéndez Brothers Netflix show. Very well done because I have no clue as to whether they should rot in jail or be released because their father allegedly molested them. Leaning towards supervised release. Being pregnant makes me so emotional about things.

We do not deserve them.

It’s not enough to just meet the right person. You need to meet them at the right time. If enough people tell you that you have done a shitty thing, you start believing it.

After three hours of an intense and grating back-and-forth, I am arbitrarily setting a new relationship rule: The fucking minute a breakup is threatened, I am out. I’m not taking this anymore. I’ll go talk to my Nigerian friends if I desire bullshit excuses.

I see you’re back, Ozzy Osbourne. Please get me in touch with Chris so I can start giving him money for investments. I mean it this time, Ozzy. I am “ready”.

Here I go again tripping about things I have absolutely no control over.

Never ascribe to malice what can be explained by incompetence.