There are many good answers when asked ‘what are your life goals’ at a job interview but apparently ‘honestly I’m just winging it’ isn’t one of them.

I bought a new hoodie from Urban Outfitters and I was so excited about the fact it was long and I finally felt like I was a normal height for the first time in my life and then I looked at the label and realised it’s a dress so how’s your Sunday going

Get you a boy like this this thanksgiving ❤️

Got this app on my phone that tracks what I do in a day and gives me tips on how to sort my life out. It gets me.

I won a latte art competition at work and I honestly, without hesitation or thought, responded by saying ‘ya yeet’ and dabbing. I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life but that has to be number one.

Last week I was sad, Writing a diss in no fun, Today I am rad, That dissertation is done.

The neighbour just came round to check that everything was okay after hearing raised voices but the truth was that I was just shouting at the cat for licking me after he licked a dead squirrel.

Every time I get a rejection from drama school I just sit and think about all the jaffa cakes I could have bought with that application money and honestly that makes me madder than not getting in.

I’m graduating today, which only serves as a reminder that it’s my final chance to get hit by the campus bus and sue the university for my tuition fees.

Just found out when my brothers and I were little my mum said to my dad ‘if you ever leave me please take them with you’ and honestly, I get it.

When old people talk about dying and say ‘I have no regrets in life’ - how? I’m only 22 and I regret essentially every single thing I’ve ever done.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, you said ‘this bish empty’ and ya yeeted it out the window.

I told my therapist to go hard on me and really work out where the root of my mental instability is and so she did and now I’m mad.

Sent a very serious work email the other day before realising the recipient was the mum of a friend I had when I was 16 and when she reads my name she’ll remember the time I got drunk and threw up in her bushes.

A co-worker once said “I just realised when I go home I don’t have to deal with you anymore but when you go home you’re still there” and honestly yes Abbie you’re right and it’s not easy

You know that dream you have about me being a 1870s cowboy? That’s right you lil freak; your dreams are coming true! Catch SPUR at the Vaults 4th-9th March

Never been reviewed before this show and you shouldn’t receive validation from stuff like this in order to have a stable career/ mental health but by george it feels good

🧵Angela Jones, a British citizen born and raised in the UK, finds herself stateless after her passport application was shockingly rejected. This story highlights the dire consequences of flawed immigration policies. #PeopleMove mylondon.news/news/south-lon…

Pulling up Baz Luhrmann's adaptation of all things as an example of 'tradition' is so tapped. The whole thing is set in Miami. They have guns. The prologues are read by news reporters. Harold Perrineau- a Black actor- plays a queer coded Mercutio in drag. Be for real.

It's 1.55 on a Monday morning and I think I'm gonna cut like 5 inches off my hair??? By myself in my bedroom??? Thoughts???