Like if your 🍆 is bigger than ur phone I wanna see something

pennywise ain’t shit i swallow kids too 🤷🏻‍♀️

my dog needs to find her own toy 😭

he wasn’t lying when he said “this dick gonna change ur life” now i got aids 😭

walmart got 80 year old grandpas watching the doors ofc ima steal

raw sex to save the turtles >>>

kids will say the most fucked up shit and then do a cartwheel like nothin happened

i’ve never heard a baby say “goo goo gaga” who tf came up with that shit

this heat made me realize i won’t survive in hell i gotta change 😭😭

life aint been the same ever since they added letters to math

“i’m here for you if u need anything” ok can we have sex lol

if im cheating wtf is calling me 73 times gonna do? 😭

getting fingered by the flash would be insane 😭

ain’t seen a “Feed The Children” commercial inna while they must be eating good asf 😭

my toxic trait is being productive for 20mins then giving myself a 2 hour break

wait people actually got allowance from their parents? thought that shit was only on TV 😭

hiii dm me if u like blondes lol

he’s a 10 but flirts with his homies better than he does you