Can’t believe I knew this 3+ years before Tim Ferriss...too bad no one pays people to just know/learn things and talk about them...oh wait, that’s what Tim Ferriss does. #influencers #millennials

❤️❤️❤️😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️

Isn’t this just an upcycled Parmesan cheese shaker?

Happy birthday to my brother and happy anniversary to Twitter and me!

What day is it? #TimeSoup

i have two modes: cult leader and lowest tier of the cult member

Can Ben Shapiro get obsessed with sports and sport stats instead? At least then the people who listen to him would be able to discern if he’s being misleading. But also big sports fanatics probably wouldn’t wanna hang out with a guy who doesn’t understand the biology behind WAP

What in the Christmas-hating-consumerism-loving-minimalist FUCK is this?

Trump supporters are rioting and looting our democracy

I hate it when people smoke in the drive thru. Like. It’s over 50 degrees in March in Cleveland, and we all have our windows open to order...I’m already doing the unhealthy thing with the whole drive thru fast food, but that was MY choice! #Freedom?

Temperature reading 98.6 like some kind of fucking wizard. #TempCheck

Who told them? nbcnews.com/news/amp/ncna1…

I need a remake of a classic courtroom drama with a 100% non-binary cast. When the writers strike ends, someone please create “12 Angry Thems.”