Did the journal factory explode is the funniest and most relateable thing I’ve heard in a long time

don’t fish for compliments around me cuz i might agree that u don’t look too good rn

i think it is important to go clinically insane briefly in ur 20s

another beautiful day of passively consuming 50,000 ads

just got my light bill , when u come to my house eat with yo flashlight on thank u

11am comes so fast in hotels like dang mr. moseby let me grab my stuff

“give a plug to yourself🙂‍↕️!” “it’s a s*x shop-” “oh😯” KAMALA WAS GAGGED LMAOOO😭😭😭

there is literally no funnier way i could've imagined this. like that's it. that's the funniest possible version of how the olaf animatronic would power off

i bring a sort of “none of this means anything” vibe to the workplace that no one there appreciates

Last time a sitting president said something I agreed with

What was the temperature of this game??

"Oh for fuck's sake what now" - me when asked to do the job I was hired to do

Sun Tzu actually has an entire section in The Art of War about screaming at the other side to open a strategic route on your own personal social media platform

this is my version of an egot

Then is crazy he tore lmfaoooooooo

hamburger help us

I'm pushing on pull doors in buildings you've never heard of