Stood on the cliffside screaming GIVE ME A RAISIN Taylor Swift #hoax

How did we read OceanGate and not think it was gonna bring a scandal

Why are we listening to the whole Ally McBeal album right now? JoJo

Pretty sure Satan invented makeup mirrors. #myporesarehuge #ihavereallybadbreathinthemorning

This mattress wedge infomercial is getting me.

"Lorde doesn't have to throw any shade, her outfits already doing it." #VMAs2014

"I love my raunchy, low life, white trash kids." Thanks, Mom. #happybirthdayoldfart

Just heard my mom yell "you suck!" at the TV. Must be football season again.

Not Everybody Sucks: Just the Ones I've Met #anovelbyhand Rachel Hope

Remember that croquembouche? JoJo

Sometimes I'm just like, "What would Tommy Pickles do?"

PayDays are just naked Baby Ruths.

I think I use my Starbucks app more than my iTunes.

If you have a pet snake... Don't talk to me. Ever.

"Slap a bun on me I'm done, man." #lifeasahamburger

"Is it nature? Is it nurture? Either way it's your fault."

Is Claritin made from packing peanuts?

I'm 99% certain growing up a #Redskins fan is how I developed my anxiety disorder.

Remember Flubber? That was weird.

Remember when Capri Suns turned you into the Silver Surfer and Gushers made you a fruit head? Those were the days.