Please stop asking to touch my "Naboobies". They are for Rey and Rey alone!

Happy Halloween!!! Oh dear, it's already November for earthlings? Time zones in space are weird.

If you're over 18 and registered, please go out and vote. If you don't, you'll end up with someone you don't like running the place, and you'll have to stick a lightsaber through them...Still cleaning Snoke guts out of the throne room BTW.

So Rey, I know you pretend you're anti-sith and all that, but I just made you a nice lightsaber. It flickers and has handle bars like mine does. The only difference is that it's pink... Change of plans, this is now my lightsaber, you can have my red one.

Keep your friends close, and the burnt helmet of a psychotic mass murderer closer.

Shadow Counselor of Kylo Ren I still get goosebumps when I'm referred to as Supreme Leader. I'd ask Snoke if the feeling fades, but...

We can't rewind, we've gone too far...

3 likes and I'll kill Lando in the next movie.

For 2019, I hope the First Order crushes the puny Resistance… #HappyNewYear #2019Hopes

I was born in the wrong generation! The empire's rule was so much better than the FO's!!!

Dear Rey, If you turn me down now, you'll never find another Sith Lord as shredded as I am. Not to mention supreme leader of the most powerful army in the Galaxy! I'm a total catch. Lots of hatred, Kylo Ren

You know what I hate? Porgs!...and also pretty much everything else.

There's like the voice in my head that keeps insisting I kill people. It's kinda freaking me out. Edit: It's my voice, I'm the one telling myself to kill everyone.

It's been 3 years since I lost my fight against Rey and resorted to begging her to join me on Twitter. Don't worry, by year 6 she'll be all mine 😎 #MyTwitterAnniversary

And that was the very last time I heard "Get a haircut, Ben"

I want a Death Star.

It's me, I'm the last Jedi!!

Alright Rey, that's the third time in a row you've forcetimed me when I was in the shower. This is way too big a coincidence.

I wish I wasn't dead...

Update: this was not the case...