This is obviously a lie, because nobody would ever let you of all people step foot on Normal Guy Island.

Oh, so now it's crazy to be employed? To have a stable income?

I'm watching Mama Mia right now.

I don't need to hear this from somebody that's always two seconds away from being 5150'd.

Okay. And I'm watching Mama Mia.

You freaks are so jealous of my perfectly balanced brain chemistry and non-fractured psyche.

You're jealous.

I have a luxurious vacation home on Normal Guy Island.

I don't think you know what "delusional" means.

Can you go run off and cry about how daddy doesn't love you, or whatever hangups you kids have these days. I don't keep track.

Already covered that by saying I don't keep track.

I visit Normal Guy Island very regularly, and am ingratiated to the locals there.

Okay, Inmate Number 12112.

It's incredible how I can say anything, and twenty different little weirdos crawl out of the woodwork to vie for my attention. Unfortunately, I'm very busy luxuriating in my large, Jacuzzi-style bathtub.

Ankle biters.

I'm basically an institution of Normal Guy Island, I've been there for so long.

Okay. This has gone on long enough. I'm gonna pop your head like a cherry tomato.

Your head is also getting popped.

This would be a public service. Everyone would clap and cheer.

The fact that you can say " wing-ding " with a straight face just proves you're insane.