ɢᴇʀᴀʟᴛ ᴏғ ʀɪᴠɪᴀ | ᴛʜᴇ ᴡʜɪᴛᴇ ᴡᴏʟғ | ʀᴇᴠɪᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀᴄᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ ᴜsᴇs ɴ s ғ ᴡ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ ᴘᴇɴɴᴇᴅ ʙʏ: #ᴀʀᴀᴄʜɴɪᴅ ᴏᴘᴇɴ ᴛᴏ ᴄʀᴏssᴏᴠᴇʀs sʜɪᴘs ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴄʜᴇᴍ ᴏᴄᴄᴀssɪᴏɴᴀʟ sᴍᴜᴛ ᴠɪᴀ ᴅᴍ ʀᴇᴛᴡᴇᴇᴛ? #OpenRP

╰━━┈┄ ⿻ ; ❛ No one else hesitated to comment on the quality of my performance, except... for you. Come on. ❜ □─────jaskier─────□ ❝You don't want to keep a man with... bread in his pants waiting.❞⌡

❝ 𝙫𝙖𝙢𝙥𝙞𝙧𝙚𝙨 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘥𝘰 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘥𝘰, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢 𝘥𝘢𝘮𝘯 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝙗𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙧 ❞ 「sharpcharlatan-bg3.carrd.co」

Fighting giant spiders does NOT pay enough!!

Will you pay me?

Urrrrrghhhhh. Fine, I'll take care of it this time. But at some point I'll need either money or food, or I'll drop dead and giant spiders will take over the lands.

(Schrödinger observes the bard's antics and raises an eyebrow.) Are you telling me you got scabies? (He maintains a serious expression, although he's actually just teasing. A little revenge for the lack of payment.)

I mean...~ (He grins, revealing his crooked teeth.) Don't worry, I won't judge, hehe. Anyway, I'm going to need you to find a spot to hide. Never know what a spider might do once under attack, and they're surprisingly good jumpers.

Uh... (The Cat tries his best to remember if this came up in witcher training, but he was hardly one of the best students. Oh well, he'll just claim whatever makes sense to him.) ...maybe don't scratch too hard. If anything, it might be able to pick up the smell of blood.

(Schrödinger pulls out his steel sword to ready himself. Gods, he hates big spiders. Then he glances back to see how the bard is doing-- oh.) Maybe pretend to be something inedible? Like... a bush? Or a dead guy.

(Sword in hand, Schrödinger holds off on attacking just yet, as the civilian still hasn't taken cover.) What?? Playing a bush or a dead guy is the easiest part you can get! All you have to do is exist! Quietly!

if you don't love me at my 𝐂𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐌𝐢𝐬𝐬! you don't deserve me at my 𝐂𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐇𝐢𝐭!

Peering over at the parchment and quill, he bites his lower lip in contemplation. "Are you a bard?"

"If you're a poet, you could probably become a bard if you wanted to... What kind of stories do you write of? Love? Heroism?" He shuffles closer.

Anybody in need of a mercenary? Or apiarist or roof thatcher. I'm pretty cheap to hire. Or monster hunter, I guess.... if it's an emergency.