I will be performing The Comedy Store this coming Friday Nov 1, at 10 pm. Message me for tix.

I wanna be as resilient to all the nos as YouTube Premium Trial popups #howtoturnthisthingoff

A bartender would make a great maraca player.

⚠️The US and #SouthKorea each had their first #COVID19 cases on the *same* day. Within 1 week, South Korea approved a #coronavirus test. Donald J. Trump TOTALLY bungled the rollout of testing, allowing the virus to spread undetected, causing this.👇🏼

When hot and cold water have a baby, he is called Luke Warm #iamyourfather #hotwatersays @HamillHimself

HE LOVES BEING HANDED THINGS x.com/maneatsdragon/…

I’ll be damned if when a COVID-19 vaccine is developed, more people die because they can’t afford to purchase it. Any life-saving vaccine must be free.

Could everyone PLEASE stop sharing this video of Michael Lofthouse? He’s the founder & CEO of Solid8, a tech company based in San Francisco. If it goes viral it could hurt Michael Lofthouse and Solid8, his company. Let’s all be nice to Michael Lofthouse and Solid8.

If you refuse to cover birth control for your employees then you should be required to give 6 months paid maternity leave plus fulltime childcare coverage upon returning to your place of holy and moral work.

So, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez just took to Instagram and raised $50,000 for immigrant families who've been frozen out of government help. Incredible.

Texas - we hear you. You didn’t want to be part of our electrical grid. And now you’ve removed your mask mandate & are allowing large crowds to gather. We hear you! COVID is a hoax! So u don’t need our precious vaccine. We’ll send it to ppl who are saving lives by wearing masks.

Colorado shooting is the 7th mass shooting in 7 days: Atlanta, Stockton, Gresham, Houston, Dallas, Philadelphia, Boulder I wonder what 12 days of Christmas is going to be “On the first day of Christmas, my NRA gave to me bang bang bang bang bang Reload”

RT FlappersComedy "Flappers University Sunday Funday, featuring @reneepercy Dominika Katherine Hyebin Yoon and more. 7pm PDT TIX: flc.cc/NP67MCM"

Last week in Austin, I got to bring up Tony Hinchcliffe. This is what he said. Happy Asian (AAPI) Heritage Month!

Do you think Johnson & Johnson have been wasting your time making you repeat the same name twice? Am I wrong or It could have easily been The Johnsons? Johnson & Johnson #johnsonandjohnson

If you are an abstract artist, you are suppose to take things out of context.

Isn’t all flowers Sun flowers #sunflowers

Dodgeball : legal way to let kids knock each other out and go home with a quiet, well-behaved child of yours who is also unconscious

All dogs 🐕 are Scratch & Win for humans #scratchandwin