Really rude of restaurant supply stores to have 30lb tubs of peanut butter for sale online. I almost ordered one three separate times. my resolve is Weak.

Guess how many Avengers were hit by a car? All of them. Literally. All of them. Most were hit intentionally.

sometimes self care is cuddling with your dog and watching golden girls. other times it’s drinking mimosas and cyberbullying the us army on twitter. it depends on the day.

Took this one the other day! Figured you guys needed some Lucky content

one of my hobbies is showing Steve and Bucky internet memes and explaining them in detail. Miku Binder Thomas Jefferson took 73 minutes.

A good 65% of the texts Natasha and I exchange are just us asking each other who fed Clint last. The other 35% are me sending her links to fanfics I think she’d like and her sending me youtube video essays.

Did you know flour is VERY flammable? I didn’t! Also what do firefighters like i need to buy a VERY expensive gift basket.

//kinda wanna make a pure parody account? like i have an idea for something

I made a dumb account follow me for funny tweets

If you ever judge someone for dipping their fries in their soda or something like that just remember that clint once bit into a brick of uncooked ramen like a monster

//apologies for being gone, i started uni. Im back tho!

As a Rich New Yorker™️ i’ve been to the met gala a few times and let me tell you having a breakdown in the womens bathroom is way more common than you might think.

Someone’s gotta set the bar, so the rest of you can limbo under it.

//god i dont understand rp ettequite and culture and the rest of the time i misunderstand things and aaaaaaah im bad at social situations lmao