If you’re getting your nails did plz tip your nail technician don’t be an ass— it’s been a year ya feet are nasty

I just found out my 3 year old nephew is convinced Joe Biden’s name is Joe Connor and I snort about it about every 20 mins now

I may not be able to run, but i can bring a therapist up to speed with my spiraling pretty ducking fast.

Shein really though hot girl summer was more like “we ain’t in Kansas now bitch”

How was Bo Burnham able to musically define my mental state. #inside

All of us in line at the dispo watching this cop do nothing about the guy screaming in traffic right in front of an exit cause he busy making sure no one lights up in the parking lot

LOLOLOL little did January 6th Kaleigh know what was about to happen as she continued to refresh

My stomach: “no! Last time we ate that we almost died!” My head: “right right right right.” My heart: “but…” My head: “but…”

I tell myself I don’t have anxiety and then I also don’t log into my animal crossing cause I know they’re all going to mention that I’ve neglected my island I KNOW TOM OK?!?

Just asking my intern to find me a sound on Instagram by sending her a YouTube of the TikTok I'm talking about. Is this just what happens with age? #NewestBoomer

has your mom/parent ever hated someone you dated so much that when ya'll broke up they bought you a ticket to France for a week in celebration? Cause that's my mom's energy...

All streaming platforms should stick to the same volume scale so my speakers do not blow out going from the silent Hulu to the glass shattering Netflix. Thank you for coming to be Ted Talk.

never forget- captain America is pro choice

What my brain tried to communicate to shamus: “I don’t want you to drive drunk so let me know if you need to stay the night to sober up” What my mouth said: “if you’re drunk tonight, don’t come home.”

And with the new addition of Dog the Bounty Hunter to the team, let history remember, it was men who made the Gabby Petito case so chaotic.

Just caught myself liking peoples posts like I do on client accounts aka not taking how damn old the pic is into consideration and now I’m gunna have to go on the run. ✌️👋

“It’s cuffing season❤️” Taylor Swift & Adele: “I think tf not!”

Having coworkers share tiktoks of old classmates is a weird dynamic I didn’t want to be apart of.