back on my ferb shit ion wanna talk

feeling the urge to isolate and push everyone away again

the urge to quit everything and just fucking die

24 on the 24th and i can’t drink 😞

i have a feeling this birthday is gonna be one for the books, but in the worst way.

i don’t know what i need anymore. i just want to stop hurting.

every week i feel like my brain unlocks a new level of depressed that i’ve never felt before

waking up every morning, saying “i can’t keep living like this” and then continuing to live like that

😞😞😞😞

i am dying inside more and more every day. i don’t know how it goes unnoticed. everything always goes unnoticed.

my heart and chest and mind and soul are screaming and i’m trying so hard to be okay but i just can’t be. i want to be normal. i want to be better. maybe i’m the problem. maybe everything is my fault. i just feel under appreciated and unwanted in almost all realms.

and honestly? all i can think about is dying or causing harm to myself but i can’t do either. i just feel trapped in my mind.

had a weird weird weird ass dream where i relapsed and i am not okay

first night alone and i already miss my partner so big 😞

i wish people talked about pregnancy constipation more because why do i have to poop so bad but nothing ever comes out 😞

god i can’t wait until im skinny again pls god pls

i am not fucking strong enough for this.

wow! embarrassed. hurt. sad. left out. fucking so goddamn embarrassing i cant believe this is my fucking life.

starting Bojack Horseman back over from the beginning pray for me in this trying time