"Everyone always says to get or stay in shape. What shape tho? Just say you want me to look like a rectangular prism or sum." - The Joey C #LizTruce

"My teacher called me out in class and asked to throw my two cents in the discussion. However, when I threw two pennies at her I somehow got in trouble (again)." -The Joey C #Lesliejordan

"We need to give Luxembourg its original borders back cause I can't see it on a map (I blame France)" -The Joey C #Halloween

"Never been so violated by being stabbed by a plastic spoon and see people cheering." - The Joey C #Powell

“How’s Arby’s still around? I never see anyone in their parking lots.” -The Joey C #kathygriffin

"If you want to save MLB and call it a real World Series, bring back the Montreal Expos." -The Joey C #TwitterBlue

"That Geico commercial with the alien is actually lowkey funny." -The Joey C #Eagles

"Twitter better not shut down, I got nowhere else to put these biblical thoughts." - The Joey C #USAvWAL

"You know it's cold outside when you go outside and it's cold." - The Joey C #englandvsUSA

"Giving people dirty looks while they buy condoms should be considered a Tier 1 War Crime." -The Joey C #SpotifyWrapped

"Making your BeReal an Instagram post is a new type of desperate." - The Joey C #Argentina

"Thinking about it rn, I think Godzilla is the one responsible for destroying the Titanic, not some stupid ice cube." - The Joey C #terryhall

"I absolutely can't stand when autocorrect just fails and my computer looks at "anf" and says "shit, I have no idea what that can be." - The Joey C #UnrealEngine

"August is just Sunday for the year." - The Joey C #PresidentElect

“Europeans be like: Americans are fat and stupid. Then smoke cigs at age 16” -The Joey C #chuckclark

“Hilton’s wifi is so bad that even the government issued birds stop working when they fly overhead.” - The Joey C #Zelda

23 Rider Men's Outdoor Track & Field Student-Athletes Earn MAAC All-Academic Team Honors 📰 gobroncs.com/news/2023/5/5/… #GoBroncs #MAACTF

“I’ve started watching my first hockey game today…and I’m still watching it” -The Joey C #lebron

“When someone says ‘don’t quote me on this’ post that quote on Twitter.” - The Joey C #rickyhenderson

Imagine writing out an entire dictionary and forgetting a word and having to do it again…damn