Another rich person that thinks they can get away from it. Dumb fuck James Khuri let his brainless unlicensed ass son drive his Lamborghini & was racing down the street hitting this poor women at 120mph. #justiceformonique #justiceformoniquemunoz plz RT

Logging on to discover a bunch more friends and family members got the vaccine

Someday I hope to attend a very cool, very exclusive premier party for my own brand of bottled water.

Most people can barely SPELL manatee, nevermind eat one.

True story: My brother hit Gordon Matthew in the head with a quarter on the #dreamoftheblueturtles tour. He stopped playing to berate the audience. When he started again we kept throwing until we ran out of coins.

Hey!? So what’s happening todayTwitter? #SMH #lol #rofl

Has it been long enough to bring back the #tidepod challenge?

I could take on a King Cobra (they are stupid). I draw the line at a Chimpanzee & everyone knows Kangaroos are cheaters, no way it would be a fair fight.

A not very current conversation with myself: How am I supposed to keep all these deer bands from the aughts straight? #Deerhoof ?#Deerhunter ? #Deertick ? That’s just too many deer bands. I give up.

Man, you Twitter people really have your shit all figured out don’t you…

Is there an aftermarket for #arclightrewardspoints ? What about Gelson’s loyalty points? I’m rich in rewards - come at me ladies

I’m thinking over the coming months that I’m going to transition to posting 100% #karenvideos

I’m never gonna get a handle on this #cancelculture stuff. Is it or is it not still ok to call your dentist a turd burglar?

Scott Bakula has got to have one of the top 10 Halloween names.

The future is female… fronted jazz fusion ensembles.

I love my #Spotify it’s great software that helps me find new music I actually like, but I know #Spotify screws artists - should I quit paying? Will it make a difference? Please chime in #spotifyartists #SpotifyWrapped

I would rather be cleaning up a drunk aunt's diarrhea at a brand new girlfriends family thanksgiving where I accidentally killed the dog than spend one minute here

Evan! How come you never told us you got cast on #TheRighteousGemstones? Evan Dando Keep up the great work!

I love the Spotify algorithms - helps me find new bands I like. I’ve discovers tons of bands I never would have found otherwise - I want to move to a service that more equitably compensate artists. Where to go? Is Apple the right alternative?

Praise me for I have inconvenienced myself hugely. I am no longer a Spotify premium subscriber. Giving my $$ to Tidal Supposedly they pay artists better. We shall see.