I don’t know who needs to hear this but it’s “voila” not “walah”

Just found out Gen Z kids are calling the 90s “the late 1900s” and I feel like I just drank from the wrong grail in Indiana Jones

People who paint their cat's claws can get in the bin.

When someone greets you by saying "oh sorry - I didn't just wake you up, did I?" Thanks, Susan. I know I look like shit, I didn't need reminding.

URGENT Anyone else had trouble booking flights with Kiwi.com? Due to what seems to be a technical glitch, my name has been passed to the airline incorrectly and their customer service team are being less than helpful. I’m due to fly this weekend and am stressing!

I cannot actually believe how bad the customer service at Kiwi.com is. Someone just hung up on me while dealing with my complaint.

This has been sent to all Labour MPs by the party leadership, banning them from posting anything on social media except for tributes to the Queen or whatever the party tells them, and banning them from talking to the media.

In practical terms, this bans Labour MPs from discussing, say: - The cost of living crisis - The police killing of Chris Kaba - The war in Ukraine and, well, anything else

I’ve come up with an interim solution to the queuing issue to see the Queen’s coffin in Westminster, let me know what you think, it’s not perfect but I don’t see anyone else coming up with anything

Shopping in @primark on Oxford Street has to be one of the most hellish experiences I've endured. I know, I shouldn't be surprised but STILL. Wow. Never again.

.PlayStation UK customer service is diabolical. How can I make a formal complaint? Ask PlayStation UK PlayStation

This comma is very important. Come and join in this brilliant show!

Best cruelty free anti wrinkle night cream?

When you send a super-important, expensive parcel for guaranteed delivery before 1pm through Royal Mail but the tracking website isn't working. Awesome. Do I get my money back if it didn't arrive before 1pm?

Did you know today is national #ShowerTogetherDay 🚿 Spice up your shower time by adding a new toy! #Arya expert Jess Wilde 👽 shares her #advice on how to introduce toys into your shower play 💦 Explore exciting ways to bring 🔥 to your #relationship with Arya.Fyi/Join

One Foreplay Trick That Will Blow Their Mind... Lustery Jess Wilde 👽 lustery.com/pov/article/on…

Every now and then I think "I should engage with Twitter more". Then I make the mistake of spending more than 5 minutes here and find my heart rate increase and I lose whatever faith I had left in humanity and have to leave. This place is the worst.

Thanks for including me @bethmayashley / Mashable. Now, go forth and play with ones' melons! 🍈🍈