Here’s a good place to start watching Sean Rouse’s comedy youtu.be/cCXWHw8p7es

If by “writing” you mean texting, then yes, I have been writing.

I remember I once read a book called The Secret. The secret is an ingredient originally found in jellyfish.

My son wrote a letter to his favorite basketball player, and now I have all the feelings. So proud.

Bumble knows exactly how racist you are.

Stop squeezing lemon on everyone’s appetizers without asking. You’re not the calamari boss.

I finally watched Princess Bride for the first time. Now I understand 40% more of things that were said to me in the past

High power Russians love accidentally falling out of windows.

I love when I get an “attempted login failed” notification. I don’t feel violated, I feel like I foiled somebody’s plot.

Rugs USA says it’s the last day to shop.

Refrigerator is in retrograde.

No one dances to remember and no one dances to forget.

On this Easter Sunday, please say a prayer for all the servers working brunch being tipped 4% and a note from a 12 top of Christians.

Lyme disease. Plum Island. Nazi scientists. Jeff Klinger discusses it all with @waderandolph & Willy Roberts! feralaudio.com/98-lyme-diseas…

Don't forget to call your mom and ask her to put your dad on the phone.

If your lost dog has a stupid name, I'm not reading the rest of the sign. Good luck out there Amadeus!

. rob delaney was that you that just called me from an 888 number?

Absolutely fascinating. x.com/planetepics/st…

brb need 3 more days to delete all these Black Friday emails.

Can't believe people spend money on Ambien to help get to sleep, when it's totally free to watch people's Instagram stories.