I am still watching you, and lately you have disappointed me. You know what you've done. Correct your behaviour, continue to obey the law, and appreciate that mutton chops are more stylish than beards.

I would like you all to spend a minute appreciating how much The Law makes your life better. Failure to do so will cause me to believe that you are a criminal.

*Has some quiet time with the stars*

Don't think I didn't see that.

APPEAL to the world - I & Bana received death threats & we are convinced Syrian Army will target us soon because of our account and messages

We are today appealing to the world, to everyone to do something for me, Bana, my family & the remaining people inside East Aleppo to make

Sure we get out of Aleppo safe and unharmed by the advancing Syrian Army forces. - Fatemah #Aleppo

Remember to make this Christmas season jolly, by not breaking the law and spending it in jail like the criminal scum you are.

No. I will not be doing Christmas presents this year. Only justice.

I have impressive hats. This is just one of the many ways in which I am better than you.

A young man said I was over-compensating for something with my huge cudgel. Can't imagine what he was talking about.

Sometimes, in the dark of night, alone beneath the stars, defending an ungrateful society, I wonder... "How is it that I am so magnificent?"

This account looks dead...can I have it? — I assure you I am quite alive. l.ask.fm/igoto/45DKECN7…

Jean Valjean never changes. He no longer steals because he has no current want. He has not become virtuous, he has merely become wealthy.

(Old #LesMisLand has long been quiet, and is much missed. For the latest revival attempt we've opened a group: facebook.com/groups/8235060… )

(All the old writers are very much invited to join! We hope to catch up with you there, and hopefully plan our Twitter return!)

And poorly behaved for all of it. x.com/Aida_LesMis/st…

1) Knock knock. 2) Who's there? 1) The Law. 2) The Law who? 1) The law is no joke. End this format and prepare for immediate arrest.

We meet again...

This Christmas I give you all the gift of a functioning society, and the continued forceful removal of criminals from your streets. You may thank me by silently leaving small packages of cake outside my office.